Thursday, May 14, 2015

Stand-In Required

I’d like to humbly request a stand-in. A stunt-double, if you will.

The requirements are simple if not completely common…

5’8”-ish.

120-130lbs, depending on the availability of good chocolate.

Slender, fit, lightly tanned.

Long dark hair, green eyes, a blink and you’d miss it Southern accent (important to the latent curve and pout of the mouth).

But here comes the tricky part…

Must have a fully functioning brain with no hiccups of panic or bouts of “annoying-the-crap” out of everyone.

Must have a mind that not only embraces normalcy but defines it.

No chemical anomalies of gray matter between the ears.

The ability to interact gracefully with other human beings is key. In fact, it is a deal-breaker.

This will be a part-time position until family co-mingling time is over and said-blogger is back in her tiny garden in her tiny backyard in her coral-colored house in Florida.

Compensation will include time with a very nice and loving family who deserve soooooo much better than what they’ve currently got with me.

Thank you and good day.

Until tomorrow…

Chloe

Post-note: I’m ready to go back home where just being me is occasionally enough.

Post-note addendum: Sorry. Self-pity smacked me a good one this morning. Hopefully I’ve got it out of my system now. Once again, apologies.

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