The Belching Heartbeats

I’m dealing with two appointments today. Specific time, face-to-face, chatting mandatory, have-to-do-it meetings.

My vile creatures of Anxiety and Panic are most happy about this. As I sit here and blog, they are feeding gluttonously on me, burping their appreciation on every third heartbeat.

I get so mad at myself on these days. I feel ugly and childish and stupid... a belching brain will do that to you.

Until tomorrow…

Chloe

Time's Up

Deadline day.

All that’s left to do on “Oklahoma” is the fleshing out of the final scene. The dialogue and plot are all there; I just need to put some flesh to the bones.

A couple hours of writing, followed by another hour of formatting and it will be time to hit the SEND button.

I will then collapse in an ungainly heap and chatter nonsensically for a few hours.

It will be ugly. I would leave now if I were you.

Until tomorrow…

Chloe

The Reinvention of Good

Can molar-grinding, marrow-gnashing, bile-tasting frustration be used for good?

We’re about to find out.

I start writing my next novel today and I am literally (ha-ha) choking on the stuff.

Mental illness is not a choice. It is not a life-decision. It is an affliction that cannot be merely shrugged off with effort. The fact that people in my life, even after all these years, still can’t seem to believe this is brutally exasperating.. and painfully disheartening.

So, as I turn to pen and paper today, I hope my words and characters can feed off this raw and admittedly ugly emotion and give birth to something, well, good.  

Until tomorrow…

Chloe